Where can I find help for math homework?

Ms. Dorothy,
My son is having a hard time understanding area and perimeter, and my own math isn't strong enough to help him with it.  I bet this is only going to get worse as the math gets harder in school. Can you tell me some good resources I can use to help us both understand his math homework?
- Middle School Mom

There are some great resources online for learning math, and many are broken down by grade-level to help you further.  

This site has lessons and practice for learning Area and Perimeter, and the links are to other websites with great resources. I like this site because the reference some of the best math tools out there, and they pull them together for you based on your specific question. 
http://math-and-reading-help-for-kids.org/math_games_for_area_and_perimeter.html

This site is my very favorite, and I've used it with all three of your boys over the years. It is packed with virtual manipulatives so that students can use "hands on" tools to learn and practice concepts rather than just learning formulas. They use a matrix of math content and grade levels to help you find the menu of activities that will help you practice the skills you need. http://nlvm.usu.edu/en/nav/vlibrary.html

This site is from the National Council of Teachers of Mathematics, and has the most cutting edge thinking about how best to teach the math you need. Every activity is aligned with standards and best practice for teaching and learning math and is also broken down by grade level.  http://illuminations.nctm.org/Activities.aspx?grade=3&srchstr=area

Be sure to look past the specific topic to the rest of these sites because there are resources here for every age and on every math standard or concept you could want. 

How can I help a child make a fresh start?

Ms. Dorothy, 
Here is a kid in fifth grade. He has always seemed to get in some trouble. Mostly impulse control, social ineptness, but big enough for other teachers to remember. Now he has the self image of a kiddo who is problematic + he's really disorganized. How do I get him ready to start middle school so he can have a fresh start?
- An Aunt

What a great positive approach.  In life, we are given a few opportunities to start fresh and re-invent ourselves, and transitioning between schools is certainly one!

Knowing that impulse control and disorganization are a part of many people's lives, but are not who they are, is a key to moving past the worry. 

Have him look over a list of symptoms for ADD or ADHD and see what things he has in common and what things he doesn't.  The sense of control that is possible when you know you are "normal" and can choose what you manifest is very powerful.

At the same time, there are many diet changes, organization systems, and focus techniques that are used to support children who struggle with these symptoms, and he may find those helpful too.

You may find the book Right Brained Children in a Left Brained World has some interesting ideas for supporting him.

Whatever you decide to try, a great move for him would be to approach his middle school teachers and explain that he is aware of his issues and that he is making efforts to grow and improve himself. Asking for the teacher's support and understanding will demonstrate maturity and self-efficacy and may win him the favor of those he has to work with for the next few  years.

Remember too, that sharing your own experiences with becoming organized, or thinking before acting, will help him to see that he is not alone and that many successful adults fought these same battles in school.

When are children proficient at typing?

Ms. Dorothy,
 _____, who is 12, has Aspergers. He is very high functioning, but not surprisingly, fine motor skills are not his forte. At what age are kids proficient at typing? How would you define proficient? Is it the sort of skill that like writing, will just improve over time as you are challenged to work at it more and more?
- A Mom

Typing has become necessary for students in Middle and High School as teachers ask for assignments turned in via email, or in manuscript formats.  Accordingly, keyboarding is taught younger than it once was.  

Some programs exist, like Type to Learn, that make learning keyboarding into a game rather than a rote drill, and can help with gaining mastery. Though even a two finger typist can become efficient with enough practice.

Because the motor movement of shaping the letters supports brain development, handwriting helps to learn spelling and helps to write at the rate that you think. If, however, you struggle with controlling a pen and your writing slows you down, learning keyboarding may be more helpful. 

There are some great articles on the Science Daily site about the importance of learning to both write and type.

The key to proficiency, for writing or typing, is the ability to communicate fluently. The skill that you have practiced enough to make words come automatically, will be the method that gets ideas from head to paper most efficiently. 

We are all slowed down in the learning stages by thinking through the spelling of words.  If your writing is additionally slowed down by the formation of letters and the discomfort of holding a writing implement, communication is inhibited.

For someone who struggles with communication already, removing as many roadblocks as possible has to be our highest priority.

The future of writing may live in touch screens, visual formats, and two thumb texting. Students who struggle with communication in general may be the pioneers in bringing new technologies to the classroom, and help to revolutionize our thinking about how we share ideas.

Why can't I use Time Out any more?

Ms. Dorothy,
I've heard some stuff lately about not using "time out" with kids. I was told that I should use a "thinking chair" or an "observation chair" but not a "time out chair."  Is this just the latest in PC terms, or is there really something different about these? 
- Home Child Care Provider

Generally, when a term becomes taboo in education, it means that the thinking has changed. It isn't just a new term, it is a new approach, and the name change is designed to make you think differently about it.

"Time out" is thought of as a way to punish or reprimand a child for wrong-doing.

"Observation" or "Thinking" or "Cool Down" or "Quiet Space" or "Peace Table" are all ways to shift the thinking from correction to learning.

When you remove a child from the group to observe what others are doing, to think about choices, to cool down, or to find a peaceful or quiet moment to re-group and become ready to return, it shouldn't be about punishment. 

Adding a "time out" consequence to a "quiet think time" when the child is calm, is a great way to satisfy the adult's need to humble and punish a child, but isn't at all about learning. 

Learning happens when the adult takes the time to talk with the child who is ready to calmly rejoin the group.  That conversation should be the point of removing a child.

If the adult is not able to talk calmly about; how the child could have handled the situation differently, and what s/he will do next time, then it is the adult who needs a "time out."

Let's move our thinking from making children comply and conform and defer to the adults, to helping children to understand how their actions and reactions impact others, and how they have the power to make different choices.

How do I show a tween he doesn't know it all?

Ms. Dorothy,

My boy is in 5th grade, and he is convinced that he knows everything. How do I show this hard-headed young man that every day is a new learning experience and an opportunity?

-"Gifted" Mom

It seems that his Gifted and Talented label has gone to his hard head.  

Perhaps you could show him the difference between learning things quickly and easily, and already knowing.  

Pick something that he has never done before, like flying a biplane, and ask him to teach you how. When he can't, ask if he will research it with you. Look up information about the plane, and let him read up about it till he can explain how it works. Then point out how this was new material that he learned.

Then ask him to teach you how to tie a shoe. 

The two are completely different experiences.

Already knowing is what you do once you have learned. But to learn, you have to first admit that you don't already know, and then go get the information.  

"Giftedness" is about the disposition to learn. Without that, he is just knowledgeable.